It is somewhat unfortunate that in many quarters, the idea of a heart balm claim, which as this blog has discussed is a legal option available to North Carolina residents, gets a bad rap.
Sometimes, people see these sorts of legal actions, which allow a victim of adultery to sue their spouse's affair partner, as vindictive and a way to collect money while exacting some revenge. This may strike one is distasteful because, even though cheating is not a nice thing to do, it is for better or worse a relatively common human behavior that many have been on both ends of.
However, the reality is a bit different. Oftentimes, in a marriage, an adulterous affair is more than just emotionally hurtful. In addition to time and attention, one's spouse could also be devoting a lot of money and other resources to pursuing their affair, if not outright giving those resources to their affair partner.
For this reason, a spouse who suspects adultery needs to take steps to protect their legal and financial interests, even if they have every intention of staying married. A previous blog post discussed some of these steps.
The idea behind any divorce, even when no affair is involved, is that a couple's hard earned property should be divided fairly between them. Adding someone else to the mix who may well be receiving this property, directly or indirectly, is simply not fair to the innocent spouse, as someone else is getting the benefit of what they contributed to their household.
A heart balm claim is not just a matter of revenge; it can well be a matter of justice and a means of getting back what one rightfully should have had from the get-go.